Friday, July 15, 2011

Slipping through my fingers




Time is slipping away.  It is mid-July already, how did that happen?!  We have really enjoyed the summer so far, and the next several weeks are filled with pool party playdates, beach days, VBS, gymnastics camp and just hang-around-the-house days.  My girls are at a really fun age and I am having what I think will be the time of my life.

There are so many moments that I stop for a second and realize how fast it's going.  It really is true that before you know it, your kids are grown.  Mine aren't of course, they are 7 and 5.  But I can see how that will happen.  I remember when they were bitties, that old adage would kind of piss me off.  I thought the women saying it completely forgot what it's like to have little ones...all the stress, crying, lack of sleep, diapers and feedings...and they romanticized the past.  I guess that's what happens...as soon as you start to sleep and enjoy being a person again, not just a busy, sweats-wearing, toddler-sitting-on-your-lap-crying-while-you-pee kind of mom, but a person...you realize it did go fast.  I don't miss my kids crying, pulling at my legs, at the sight of me putting on my makeup because they knew that meant I was leaving...but I do miss them waving at the window, with little pouts on their faces.  Who else loves me that much that if I go to the grocery store they cry?

They're growing, my girls.  Not grown, but growing.  I'm happy they still run to me with open arms when they see me...most of the time anyway.  Sometimes they just say "hi mom" and I know that they aren't babies anymore, when I was their world.  I don't want to be their world...there is so much beauty and fun out there I want them to enjoy.  But I don't think anyone or anything will ever make feel so special and loved, as these little girls have.  I'm not their world, but they really are mine.

Today, they are still kind-of little.  And I love it.  As I write, they have on their gymnastics orange and black leopard leotards, with purple butterfly wings, princess dress-up shoes and train conductor hats.  Can you picture it?  Cuteness.  They are using their walkie talkies and doing a search of the house for princess treasure.  I tried to get them to search out dust with "princess fairy dust wands" -aka Swiffers - but they didn't buy it.  They took the Swiffers, but no dusting.

They may make me crazy sometimes, and some days still feel long and stressful.  But I wouldn't trade this time in my life for anything.  What a gift.

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